Wednesday, December 17, 2008


Wow, it's been a week since I've blogged. That flew by fast. Interestingly enough, I am at it again, just finishing up two days worth of dishes. This time it's 12:45 in the morning. Not quite as bad.

These days Tylo hasn't been going to bed until very late. Like midnight. Which means me getting to clean up after dinner, showering, getting ready to bed, all gets pushed back until after she goes to bed. So I used to have the energy for a post after midnight when all is done and I'm ready for bed. But now it's like 2 am and I'm too tired. Straight to bed I go. Not that I can fall asleep. There's nothing I hate more than working then having to go straight to bed without the couch potato down time.

The last two days Tylo has been a nightmare come bedtime. She loves to play too much and fights being put to bed, even though she's rubbing her eyes and yawning like crazy. It started maybe a week ago. Usually she goes to bed between 5-6 for two hours, wakes up at 9 for a feeding, and is back to bed in an hour. These days that hour has stretched to three. For some reason, she wakes up earlier too. 5 am, instead of 7 am. I adore playing with her with her daddy around, but she can't be coping well with all that missed sleep.

So her doctor suggested that Tylo was old enough to skip the 9 pm feeding and we should try to let her cry it out. She just turned 6 months and that's supposed to be old enough for the CIO method. I felt bold when I got home yesterday, and was ready to try it that night. Up until this point I pretty much gave in to every peep she's ever made. I rushed to satisfy her every need to eat, be held, be smiled at. Most of the time she was great anyway, and not like I had a job I needed the sleep for. I almost felt like I didn't deserve any normalcy, and I was obligated to make sure she got whatever she wanted. But it must be true - babies need their uninterrupted sleep, and lots of it.

Anyway, to start off slow, I didn't skip the feeding, but put her to bed right away. When Tylo first started crying around 12 last night, it was more like a frustrated yelling. I watched the clock for 5 minutes, amused really. Two more minutes and she was asleep. I couldn't believe how easy that was.

Somehow, she started up again 15 minutes later. Then it got louder and louder. The wailing, high pitched cry. Then came the tears, and the hoarseness. I kept peeping in on her, making sure her blanket wasn't pulled over her face and suffocating her, or that her head wasn't trapped against her crib rail. None of those. It got worse and worse. Babies have this way of crying like they're in the worst pain in the world, completely abandoned and scared to death. I started watching the clock. I told myself to wait 10 minutes. I secretly wished HP would ask me to pick her up because he wanted to sleep. I managed to wait 12.

As soon as I rushed to her crib and started patting her chest she stopped wailing but she was still shaking and sobbing. I picked her up and held her tight and it took a several minutes for her to calm down her sobs, even though she started smiling right away.

When I put her down again, she went to sleep pretty quickly. Probably tired herself out with all that crying. But she woke up several times later, and went to bed pretty easily each time.

Tonight we tried again, and the cry fest happened all over again. This time we rushed to her faster but it took a lot longer to calm her down. And she did not sleep quickly after that. It was probably 3 when she finally fell in a deep sleep.

Sometimes, after I watch a really sad movie, or have a bad fight with HP, I cry pretty hard. I get the worst headache afterward, my nose and ears are completely clogged. When I wake up my eyes are still swollen and the headache is still there. My skin is irritated from all the salty tears. And I'm not even wailing until my voice is gone like Tylo is.

They say the cry it out method can take an hour of wailing, sobbing uncontrollably, even choking and vomiting. But in three days or even less, your baby will sleep through the night. I haven't heard of a single case where it didn't work, when the parents stuck with it.

Maybe it would save me some sanity, and some much needed time to sleep and to myself. But I am definitely not ready to subject my baby to that.

To be continued . . .


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